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...Carmelite

Today is Sunday.. this morning I went to Carmelite with mom and several other friends.. we attended this sharing on the Order of Carmelite.. it was a simple invitation of how to live a life in God even if you're not part of the religious life (priests, nuns).. it was quite fun, we've learnt a lot and I have realized na you don't really need to become a nun in order to serve God.. even in simple day-to-day life pala you can.. was motivated today to live my life.. as in.

What struck me today was the fact that.. in God pala there's no such thing as Depression, Worry, and Fear.. well.. I have been depressed lately.. and there was a kind of 'emptiness' but I realized na maybe I just didn't have enough faith in God lang.. coz thru God there is hope.. so now I'll start being more positive not only in the outside but on the indside as well.. another was on Love.. nakz.. love na naman.. but no seriously, the talk this morning made my heart feel a little lighter.. I had been asking God kung why He allowed me to lose the one to whom I felt and seen true love, this had been the major cause of my 'emptiness' for a couple of months now - then the talk struck me... Maybe I was too attached unto him na, na I forgot to live my life as God wanted me to.

Yeah.. surprising as it may seem.. it's true.. I have been focusing so much on how much I felt love.. I forgot all else.. maybe God just wanted to lead me back to the path I'm supposed to take by allowing him to move away and not communicate anymore. Yeah it hurts bigtime, specially now-a-days where I don't have anyone to talk to anymore.. I have been craving for attention from others, wanting to somehow fill the gap in my heart now that he's no longer there.. I'm so thankful I got the chance to attend kanina coz I saw there's Hope.. not the kind of hope that maybe someday I'll find him again.. but the kind of hope where I know I am loved by God and that he is the best and most perfect friend I could ever have.. =)

Yeah I'm still missing the person.. but all is lighter now that I have support from others. I'm just praying na I can take up this cross and follow God.

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