Frustration and depression has taken the best of me today.. It all started with the cramps I've been feeling the whole night last night which lasted til I woke up at 4am.. all throughout the day I felt like in labor (as if na-try na noh? hehe) had the check-up sa OB-Gyne kanina and whew.. it was normal for me.. but she fears I have the pattern of someone who's got Endometrial Cancer - uh-oh.. pattern pa lang.. so don't be alarmed.. so now I'm into more treatment.. hayy.. she says usually lumalabas late 30's.. so thank God I'm still 24 eh?
Oh well..
I just don't get my system thesedays.. I get hyper active.. then hyper lazy.. then hyper happy.. now, nothing could ever make me smile.. hahayy...
They were even joking around na I should look for someone to impregnate me ASAP! but that doesn't just happen.. and I started asking myself.. Will I still have someone who'll truly love me if this thing would not heal? I've got so many What If's, I don't want to think about it..
May joke din about the expenses my parents have been paying for all my medications.. whew.. It'll surely make my potential mate run for his life.. hay.. hehehe...
Haven't been helpful that much sa house work.. neither have I been helpful sa finances.. hay.. I truly feel so useless.. and now this.. but amidst all of these.. My parents/family do love me, no questions asked.. and I'm glad I got them..
I guess I should be contented to be truly happy.. I just can't figure myself out, why I want so much to have someone to love me pa.. funny but I get teary-eyed seeing couples.. I'm not like this! .......
I should stop imagining things na.. and appreciate what I got.
Oh well..
I just don't get my system thesedays.. I get hyper active.. then hyper lazy.. then hyper happy.. now, nothing could ever make me smile.. hahayy...
They were even joking around na I should look for someone to impregnate me ASAP! but that doesn't just happen.. and I started asking myself.. Will I still have someone who'll truly love me if this thing would not heal? I've got so many What If's, I don't want to think about it..
May joke din about the expenses my parents have been paying for all my medications.. whew.. It'll surely make my potential mate run for his life.. hay.. hehehe...
Haven't been helpful that much sa house work.. neither have I been helpful sa finances.. hay.. I truly feel so useless.. and now this.. but amidst all of these.. My parents/family do love me, no questions asked.. and I'm glad I got them..
I guess I should be contented to be truly happy.. I just can't figure myself out, why I want so much to have someone to love me pa.. funny but I get teary-eyed seeing couples.. I'm not like this! .......
I should stop imagining things na.. and appreciate what I got.
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