Skip to main content

..want to be super sleepy before i lie down to sleep..

am i tired? yeah!
am i sleepy? yeah!
then why don't i go to sleep?!
~ simply because if im not yet SUPER DUPER sleepy, when i lie down, i get restless and think negative thoughts again, worries and insecurities that'll keep me up all night! yeah, kinda sounds weird but i only lie down now-a-days when my eyes are too heavy to stay open.

hmm.. i've been having sleep problems for weeks now.. it's funny coz kung kelan pa nagiging super busy days ko eh this thing occurs.. hmm.. well.. maybe my mind if working overtime lang.

~
anyways, no matter how BUSY the word busy means, i don't believe one truly IS busy.. i think they just dont want to squeeze in some stuff.. BUSY is a poor excuse to say than saying out loud I DON'T WANT TO.. well.. though i do try to keep myself positive these days, there are just times when one misses the old times (im only human..) yeah i do hope and am trying to be heartless but.. well.. grr... no matter how hard i try.. some thoughts just pop up!.. like thoughts of that someone i really cared for.. whew.. denying the fact that i miss him at times is such a difficult lie to admit.. haha.. but am getting good at reasoning na siguro that's why i don't hurt as much anymore..

was talking to bevs (an office-business-friend) a couple of days ago.. we started talking about familiar things (we are at the same type of situation ~ feeling for someone a thousand miles away ~ not really sure of what's real and imaginary *haha! i know many can relate to those nowadays*) didn't really intentionally want to talk about it.. but due to time availabilty, we just pondered on.. and i realized.. though the feeling might have been imaginary all along, the events truly shaped us (in this case me) so much more than anyone could ever believe so.. no matter how the past have marked some wounds, it truly helps us become even better.. nakz.. im not really into this typing thing.. but.. just realized whew.. he did get the worst of me.. haha.. thinking on what i have done to the person, how my attitude was, how demanding i might have seemed, how much did he suffer kaya?! enduring all those immaturity! whew! hahaha...

hehe on the lighter side.. ive truly appreciated how much time he did spend for me.. and siguro the regret i have now is sayang coz he never saw the mature me.. i can be mature rin pala.. siguro di niya nakayanan ang immaturity.. whew.. hehe..

well.. enough of the senti-ness..siguro there's a great part of me that wishes na sana i wasn't so immature when we met.. and wondering.. how things could have been if i met him now. im not saying im all-mature now.. but i know ive grown in wisdom and maturity kahit papano.


Maybe it's wrong to say 'please love me too' coz i know you'll never do...
.... somebody else is waiting there inside for you...
Maybe it's wrong to love you more each day...
....coz i know she's there to stay...


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Translations

Words are oftentimes mis-used or even mistranslated when you over-translate them. It even loses it's meaning and may come out funny. One classic example would be TOOTHPASTE. I'm particularly interested in this word (or noun) because it doesn't have a translation in Filipino or in our dialect. Well, for those who know what the words are then please correct me :) I came across this topic in a skype group the other day, we were chatting our hearts out with people from around the world (well most are Filipinos but in different countries) then one person blurted " so ano ang tagalog sa toothpaste? " Everyone kept silent then someone suddenly blurted " joke ba yan? " then most chorused " COLGATE! "... much to my demise, I realized, I didn't know what the tagalog word is for Toothpaste, yet alone know the bisaya term for it. So, I researched online but nothing. Then started texting my friends (Globe lang coz free txt ako sa globe hehhehe) then pe...

Joke Text Messages --- A Reflection

Sa sermon, bag-ong Kano nga pari gitabangan sa Pinoy Interpreter: Pari: The Lord was crucified between two robblers. Roy: Si Hesus gilansang tunga sa duha ka goma. Pari: If we do not repent. Roy: Kung dili ta mamintal ug usab. Pari: The wrath of God will come upon you. Roy: Ang mga ilaga sa Dios moanha kaninyo . (Nangatawa ang mga nanimba) Pari: Well.. well... Roy: Atabay, Atabay.. . Those are one of the many jokes I often receive on day-to-day basis and it truly makes me smile and wonder: How do makers of these jokes ever conceive such simple yet effective ones? Well, maybe it's just me, maybe mababaw lang talaga ang kaligayahan ko .. or simply maybe my tickle bones are just too sensitive. But it's funny.. most especially the joke which follows: During the Last Supper, Jesus broke bread and shared to the twelve. So did they share with the wine... then Jesus said, " Naa diri kaninyo karon ang tao nga mag- betray kanako" ... Then Jesus looked sternly to Judas.. Judas...

Way Back Into Love

Way Back into Love (featuring: Haley Bennett and Hugh Grant) OST: Music and Lyrics I've been living with a shadow overhead I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed I've been lonely for so long Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away Just in case I ever need em again someday I've been setting aside time To clear a little space in the corners of my mind All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way back into love Oh oh oh I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine I've been searching but I just don't see the signs I know that it's out there There's got to be something for my soul somewhere I've been looking for someone to shed some light Not somebody just to get me through the night I could use some direction And I'm open to your suggestions All I want to do is find a way back into love I can't make it through without a way b...